Archives for the month of: May, 2014

It feels like lately Eisley has had a more difficult time NOT being gross. I’ve begun to realize that pickiness must come much later in life. Please look at this cute photo series of Eisley and her Daddy before I tell her story so that you have a mental picture of her cuteness instead of her depravity.

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Recently, Jojo woke up to get Eisley out of her crib. Ever since we went on our trip to Alaska she has pooped during the night which normally never happens. Although she is back to her normal poop-time, that morning she awoke to a poo-filled diaper. He calmly came into the bedroom with her in hand waking me with the sweet words, “honey, she got her diaper off and was sitting there eating her poo.” I cannot tell you how fast my heart dropped, nor can I express the disgust that contorted my face as I bathed her. My little princess lost her sparkling tiara that morning.
Now to further your view of my child’s sense of good judgement; today Eisley had a series of misadventure, making the first three hours since we’ve been up a bit bumpy. I always try to keep the bathroom door shut because Eisley just seems to have a magnetic pull to toilets. So, aside from licking the toilet seat, playing in the water and digging through that garbage, the clincher for today was her bringing the toilet wand to my bedroom in her mouth. After that, she needed to be changed from her poopy diaper, but before I threw the diaper away she touched the poop, then stuck her hands in my water glass and splashed around. MORTIFIED. That’s the word of the morning. All poop-related things aside, she also spilled Scout’s water (a common daily occurrence) and slipped in the kitchen. Later she rummaged through the dirty clothes, somehow got my bra wrapped around her thighs, neck and arms and proceeded to scream when she couldn’t get out.
I’ve often been complimented on Eisley’s cheerful disposition. I frequently hear, “how do you wear such high heels and be a mom?” These are things that make you feel like others see you as “super mom”. Let this record stand to show that I am indeed NOT a super mom. I’m just a kid, crazy in love with this little, gross, incredible, baby girl.

Breakfast is my very favorite meal. I go to bed dreaming about what I’m going to get to eat the next morning. (That’s possible unhealthy.. Eh.) Today I wanted to start my morning off with high protein deliciousness, so I made a great big pot of Breakfast Quinoa.

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The great thing about quinoa is that you can do SO many things with it. I myself have taken the time to explore it’s wide range of uses and I am never disappointed. Breakfast Quinoa is essentially “oatmeal” that replaces the oats for quinoa! Pretty simple eh? So to make this scrumptious breakfast I cooked the quinoa in water, as directed, until soft. Then I added, without measuring a darn thing; almond milk, brown sugar, vanilla, cinnamon, nutmeg, frozen blueberries and I topped it off with chopped walnuts and shredded unsweetened coconut. Presto! A breakfast fit for a… really cool person with great taste! Minus the walnuts and coconut and babies love it too! Just ask Eisley 😉

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Haha she looks like she hates it. Hilarious.

For a while now I have had the intention of sharing Eisley’s birth story. Everyone is so unique, as is the way we come into this world. I won’t share anything that would be considered inappropriate, however, this is a story about birth and the word vagina is not a bad word. So get over yourselves.

Life is not for the faint of heart.

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Before we ever became pregnant we knew we wanted to have a home birth. Jojo was a home birth (a story that is so full of misadventure and beauty that you must hear it someday!) and we felt secure and safe which our decision to birth in the comfort and control of where we lived. I realize that for most people who are uneducated to the workings of home-birth, words like “safety”, “security” and “control” must rarely seem to be associated with birthing outside of a hospital/hospital environment, but I assure you, that is a common misconception. I feel the need to say that I do not look down upon mothers who choose to birth in hospitals. I believe that all women should birth where ever they feel is the best place to bring their child into the world. It’s a honor that God has only bestowed to us women and we should be allowed to be where ever we can get the job done the best for our little ones.

With, what I believed would be, a month left of pregnancy, we were thrown a curveball that seemed to shatter the world for me. I would not be allowed to birth in our home because of liability concerns from our landlords. Even with a reassurance from our midwives and an agreement to sign any sort of legal documents that would ease them, we were hit with a solid red light. I remember crying, telling Jojo that our baby would just have to be born in the back of our car. In case you’ve not yet picked up on it, or you yourself have yet to be pregnant, DRAMA was my middle name. (Still is in some cases!)

At 11:30pm June 10th I felt my very first contraction. I didn’t tell Jojo as we were laying down to go to bed because I wanted to make sure he would get rest that night; I knew I wouldn’t. Again, if you haven’t had a baby yet, there is a slight terrifying thought that runs through your head as you start feeling contractions. The though is “It’s happening and I don’t think I can stop it.”

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The contraction continued slowly through the night, and on throughout the day of June 11th. I forgot to mention that at this point I am one day away from being 42weeks pregnant. Jojo went to work and I sat around the house with my Mama trying to distract myself with games and movies. When Jojo came home we played Skipbo and every time my turn came we all had to pause while I breathed heavy through a contraction that was becoming more and more unbearable. It was getting to the point where I was becoming unable to talk my way through the contractions and after some wrestling with the will of our midwife, we got in two cars and drove towards their cottage/office. I remember that drive being very long, and very wet. The rain was coming down softly outside and hardly any cars were on the road. It must have been close to 7pm. At an intersection I remember seeing a car’s headlights coming straight at us. Some random crazy was driving on the wrong side of the road! I remember praying that they wouldn’t hit my mom and friend Esther who were a couple streets behind us. That took up some room in my brain which made it easier to get through some very rough contractions. I mean it when I say that the contractions are the worst part.

I was only at 6 centimeters when we had the midwife check me. So two more hours of walking around screaming! Initially, our birth plan involved water birth. Jojo blew up the tub which took up over half of the remaining space in the room. The tub was able to be filled a few inches with water before we had no more hot water for the rest of the night. SO, unable to remove the pool quickly from the setting, and unable to utilize it, a large chunk of the room was unusable and the other half was taken up by a rickety futon. I’m at 8 centimeters. Two more hours. The thought crosses my mind that it can’t possibly get worse. But it does. I think the worst part about birthing pains in natural birth is that there isn’t any way to console yourself. You get a headache and you can take some tylenol, drink some caffeine, use an ice pack etc.. same thing with other body aches. With a contraction, there is just nothing. It hurts, then it hurts worse. I remember looking at Jojo, as I hung low from his shoulders and I told him that I didn’t think I could do it. He looked down at me so sweetly and said, “You have to.” Hahahaha…. oh man….

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I finally reached 10 centimeters and was able to start pushing, which I did hunched over my yoga ball. It took two hours to get that little bear cub out, but she finally came! 3:25AM June 12, 2013 Jojo and I became parents! It couldn’t believe she was finally here! I also couldn’t believe how insanely long her head was! No one tells you that your baby looks super creepy the moment it comes out. I couldn’t hold Eisley right away because I felt like my heart was exploding. I hurt my throat and chest from all the screaming I did. The irony in that is, I told my whole birth class that I get really quiet when I am hurting so I probably wouldn’t be using any of the guttural growling noises we learned. HA! Fluid had built up in my chest all the way to my cheeks from the screaming. It sounded like rice krispies whenever I touched my face or neck. I still don’t really know what that was till this day, but it went away after a day or two.

Jojo was the first to hold Eisley and he cut her umbilical chord after it stopped pumping blood.

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I can’t think of a better moment in time than that morning. Then I began to feel things I could never describe to other soul, only I now know what it feels like to be whole.

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(Ignore my big fat sumo chin please.)

I was on a cruise ship for my first Mother’s Day and was unable to write anything on the subject then, but that can’t stop me from writing about how magnificent mother’s are. I’ve been blessed not only to have an incredible Mama myself, but to also have wonderful mom friends who are the epitome of sacrifice. I think the closest, physical example of God’s unconditional love we have can be found in a mother playing with and laying down her life for her child.
In honor of mom’s day, I thought it would be fun to interview my own Mama.
Me: What is the best part of being a mom?

Mama:(a deep sigh) there is so much I don’t think I could pick one thing, but I think the best part is the love you get back from your kids. Being a mom changes your life.. For the better of course. It changes who you are.

Me:What is the hardest part about motherhood?

Mama:letting go. Especially when you can’t rescue your kids from everything. You feel hopeless because you want to make their paths right or help them avoid hurtful situations. Just letting go. Knowing that they belong to Jesus and not you. Which is a good thing but it’s still hard.

Me:What challenges did you face as a mom in the early years?

Mama:That’s easy. Being a single mother. I didn’t have any family for back up or a support system either. It was hard because in the midst of it I felt forsaken and abandoned by God, which I know is not true. Looking back I see how he took care of us. I know I felt that way because it was hard. In the thick of it it’s hard to see God, but when it’s over you can see God’s mercy and how he provided and protected us.

Me:What has change for you as a mom since your kids have grown?

Mama:Obviously it’s becoming friends with them. Before my main job was being a parent, but now I can have a relationship and enjoy friendships because I don’t have to be a care taker or a disciplinarian. I can just enjoy who they have become.

Me: What advice would you give to new moms?

Mama:T
hat’s a good one. I personally live with regrets because I made unimportant things more important than enjoying my kids. I cared more about cleaning things rather than just coloring with my kids. I feel I wasted time. So I would say chose what is most important. Which is time with your kids cause you can’t get it back and you don’t want to lose it.

Me:Who is your favorite?

Mama:You’re serious? Haha I love you all the same but my relationship with you each is different.

Me:I know it’s me.

Mama:I think if all my kids think they’re my favorite then I have done something right.

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Eisley’s first birthday approaches at a speed that feels much to rapid for my taste. I’ve got nothing against growing up and growing older, but life feels so much more fleeting when you are just a bystander. I am a peeping-Tom, gazing into a window of her life in it’s most fragile of stages. I’m honored to be the one who gets to see her discover life in it’s purest form. She is untainted. Unused. Unworn. I’m so curious! So anxious to know and witness all she will do. To see her burn with passion and feel her fire that flickers from a distance as she leaves me to chase that life with such zeal. But I can wait for that. I’d slow this time down to stare in those eyes that match the sea. Those eyes that peek behind a filter of black lashes and wonder. The strands of gold twisted throughout your hair… I could hold you forever my little bear cub.

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On May 6th, my husband’s family and ourselves went on our first vacation since being married almost three years ago. My heart skipped a few beats when I learned we would be going to Alaska. It has been my dream since I was a little girl to go to Alaska. It was a great time of the year to go too, since it was fairly warm for Alaska, seeing as my SoCal skin can no longer handle degrees below 60. Since we journeyed to Alaska by way of ship, we had to stay on the cruise line’s schedule. So, although I enjoyed my short time that was actually spent in Alaska, it was just that: Short. However, the amount of time that was spent on the ship felt endless. I couldn’t begin to count how much cake I ate while aboard, nor would I want to out of shame!
I was surprised by how well Eisley did aboard the ship. I myself do not tend to suffer from seasickness, but we had one EXTREMELY rough day at sea that sent me into fits of moaning while lying in the fetal position on the floor of our cabin. During my sick period, Eisley was just mucking about the cabin getting into her usual trouble, babbling sweetly to herself per usual. She is one tough kid. Eisley turned 11 months while we sailed about the southern end of Alaska. It’s so crazy that in her short life this far she has already been on 3 boats, 6 planes, 1 fire truck and 3 countries. Her life is beginning to be an awfully big adventure indeed.
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